GLAMOROUS INDIAN WEDDING

INDIAN MARRIAGES

In India, there is no greater event in a family than a wedding, dramatically evoking every possible social obligation, kinship bond, traditional value, impassioned sentiment, and economic resource. Marriage is deemed essential for virtually everyone in India. For the individual, marriage is the great watershed in life, marking the transition to adulthood. Generally, this transition, like everything else in India, depends little upon individual volition but instead occurs as a result of the efforts of many people. Indian marriages are many a times "arranged", although that is changing dramatically. Is has been said that two people marry not only themselves but two families get married to each other. Therefore you will see that some Indian parents still play a big role in finding a bride or a groom for their children. With westernization influencing the eastern cultures many age old practices are being forgotten. There are over 50 cultures in India and because of this there are many different types of wedding celebrations all over India. For example:

• Punjabi Wedding,
• Tamil Wedding
  
• Sindhi Wedding,

• Telugu Wedding,
• Gujarati Wedding
• Kashmiri Wedding

Because there are so many, our main focus will be the Punjabi Wedding.

Commonly used terms at Indian Marriage ceremonies

Here are some of the terms commonly used at Indian weddings.

Kundli - is a horoscope made when a child is born.

Pundit - is a religious person who carries out the prayers for the marriage ceremonies. Mehndi – a paste made out of dried and crushed Henna leaves and applied on the hands and feet in a decorative manner. This is also known and popularized here in the US as "temporary tatoos".

Mehndi-wallis – women who apply mehndi on a professional basis.

Saree – a traditional outfit for women, which is a 6 feet long cloth tied in a traditional manner around the waist and worn with a figure-hugging blouse.

Puja – ceremony or prayer.

Puja samaan – religious items used for the ceremony.

Shlokas – religious sayings.

Punjabi Wedding Ceremony

Punjabis are large hearted people who love splendor and greatness. They are also keen on festivals and celebrations. This nature of Punjabis also reflects in their marriage celebrations. Like other Indian weddings, a Punjabi marriage ceremony is very ritualistic but also full of fun and and can be very exciting. It is in fact one of the most colorful and musical marriage ceremonies in the country. Each ceremony is like an excuse for having fun. A Punjabi Wedding is very vibrant and celebrated like a big carnival and is an experience almost all Indians would die for.

Pre wedding Rituals

Punjabi marriage traditions are very elaborate and ritualistic. They begin days before the actual wedding day in the form of pre-wedding ceremonies.

Roka is the first pre-wedding ceremony where the two families formally meet to finalize the relationship between the two families. Roka is then followed by a series of colorful and interesting occasions like ‘Sagan and Chunni Chadhana’. As the actual wedding day comes near, the celebrations become more vibrant and vivacious. Sangeet is held only few days before the wedding day and is the most amusing pre-wedding ceremony. Mehandi is held a night or two before the marriage day and is important part of the pre-wedding celebrations.

Roka Ceremony
Roka ceremony marks the beginning of a formal relationship between the two families. It is basically carried out to secure the commitment of both the parties. It is a small function involving the family members and close relatives of both the prospective bride and groom. The families involved exchange gifts, sweets, fruits and dry fruits.

Sagan Ceremony
Sagan ceremony can be held either at the groom’s house or at a banquet hall. A havan is performed by a pundit who is a religious person who carries out the prayers for the marriage ceremonies. . Thereafter, the prospective bride’s father applies Tilak (made of kesar, rice grains and flower petals) on the boy’s forehead. All the relatives and friends of the girl’s side come forward to bless the prospective groom, offer sweets to him and give him cash/gifts.

Chunni Chadana
On the occasion of Chunni chadana, groom's parents and close relatives visit the bride’s house. The groom’s sister or sister in law presents the girl a red sari which is a traditional outfit for women, as a token of acceptance of the girl in their family. Thereafter, the girl is dressed in the clothes given by the boy’s family. The main ritual of the ceremony is when the girl’s would be mother-in-law places a red chunni on the girl’s head and gives her some traditional jewelry. Following this is a ritual in which the girl is fed boiled rice and milk by all the relatives of the boy that are present at the time. The ceremony comes to an end with the exchanging of rings between the prospective bride and groom.

Sangeet
Sangeet is the musical program, which is held at both the bride as well as groom’s house. In the sangeet session, wedding folk songs are sung and all the relatives and friends dance to the tunes of the music. This ceremony is considered lucky as the wedding songs are said to be full of blessings for the prospective couple. Also, this ceremony becomes amusing with interesting songs with teasing punches for the prospective couple and dance performances by every younger and elder member of the family.

Mehandi
Like other Hindu Weddings, Mehandi (Hena) is also an important pre-wedding ritual of a

Punjabi marriage.As a part of the ceremony, Mehandi is taken to the girl’s place by the boy’s

sister and brother-in-law. This Mehandi is then applied to the girl’s hands and feet in beautiful motifs. This ceremony also includes dry fruits, specifically dry dates.

The girl eats half of a dry date and the other half is given to the boy, this ritual is said

to increase the love between the two.

Rituals at the Bride’s home-

Chuda
On the wedding day the rituals at the girl’s home begin with the Chuda ceremony. To commemorate the Chuda ceremony, a havan or puja is conducted by the pandit. Thereafter, the pundit ties a mauli on the to be bride’s wrist. The oldest maternal uncle and aunt play an important role in the performance of the ceremony. They fast till the event is completed. Chuda is basically a set of red and cream ivory bangles that is touched by all present. People touch the chuda and give their heartiest wishes to the girl for her future married life. Also, they sprinkle flower petals on the bride. Prasad is distributed to all. After that, the girl’s uncle, aunt, friends and cousins tie kaliras (silver, gold or gold plated traditional ornaments) to a bangle worn by the girl.

Vatna
Four lamps or diyas are lit and the bride is made to sit facing them. Oil is constantly poured into the lamps, so that the glow from diyas is reflected on her face. Vatna involves applying the paste made from turmeric powder and mustard oil all over the girl’s body by her female friends and relatives. This is done to make the girl look more beautiful on the special day of our life.

Ghara Ghardoli
The Ghara Ghardoli follows the Vatna. In the Ghara Ghardoli ritual, the bride’s sibling or sibling’s spouse visits the nearby temple and fills a pitcher with holy water. The girl is then bathed with this holy water. Thereafter, the bride wears their wedding attire.The ghara ghardoli and the vatna ceremonies take place at the groom’s house too. But over there, the boy’s sister-in-law brings the pitcher of water. As per the tradition, their wedding dress is presented to them by their respective maternal uncles.

Rituals at the Groom’s home

Sehrabandi
Like the bride’s home, the Vatna and Ghara Ghardoli are followed by the dressing up of groom in his wedding attire. After the groom has dressed up in his wedding clothes, a pooja is performed. Thereafter, the groom’s father or any elderly relative ties the "sehra" on the groom’s head. The boy also wears a pink color turban, which is touched by all the people present in the pooja. After the completion of Sehrabandi ceremony, all those who witness the function give gifts and cash to the boy as a token of good luck.

Ghodi Chadna
The Ghori Chadna is the final ceremony at the groom’s place. The groom’s sister-in-law lines the boy’s eyes with surma. Thereafter, the groom’s sisters and cousins feed and adorn his mare. To ward off the evil eye, people use cash and perform the Varna ritual. After that the boy climbs the horse and immediately leaves his home for the wedding venue.

Rituals at the Marriage Venue

Milni Ceremony
When the groom’s barat reaches the wedding venue, Milni ceremony is performed. The bride’s close relatives give a warm welcome to the groom and his relatives with flower garlands. Rose water is sprinkled on them. In the Milni ceremony, the girl's relatives give Shagun (a token of good luck) to the groom's close relatives. It is done in the descending order, beginning from the elder most. Cash and clothes are gifted.

Varmala
Varmala is the actual beginning of marriage rituals on the involves the exchange of garlands between the bride and groom. Friends and relatives of the bride and groom indulge in teasing and fun, to celebrate this happy occasion. An auspicious time or muhurat is chosen for the performance of wedding ceremony. At the time of muhurat, the purohit conducts a puja for the groom, in which the groom is asked to chant the first few mantras. It is during this time, when the bride’s sisters indulge in stealing of shoes. It is a fun tradition, in which the girls charge a fee for agreeing to return the shoes.

Kanyadaan and Phere
The wedding is actually solemnized with four important rituals- the Kanyadaan, in which the bride’s father giving his daughter's hand to the groom, the Mangalpheras in front of the sacred fire, the Sindoor ritual when the groom applies vermilion to the girl’s hair partition and the Mangalsutra Rasam when the groom ties a beaded necklace to the girl’s neck. When all these rituals are over, the couple gets up to touch the feet of all the elder members in the family and seek their blessings for a happily married life.

Post wedding Rituals

The post wedding celebrations start right after the solemnization of marriage at the Mandap. Preparations for Vidaai and Ashwirwad ceremony go hand in hand. Once the couple is blessed by all the elderly people at home, the brother of the bride accompanies the couple for Vidaai to the main exit of their home. The celebrations after Vidaai takes place at the groom’s place except for the Pag Phere Ceremony at the bride’s home the next day after the marriage.

Vidaai Ceremony
In the Vidaai ceremony, the bride departs from her parental house and bids goodbye to her parents, friends and relatives. While leaving the home, the bride throws back handful of puffed rice back at the main exit of her father’s home as a token of her father’s prosperity and good luck. Thereafter, she boards a beautifully decorated car and heads her way towards her new home.

Swagat Ceremony
After the marriage is over, the bride is welcomed at the groom’s house. She is welcomed by her mother in law at the entrance of her new home by putting the sarson ka tel (mustard oil) on both the sides of the entrance door. Then, a traditional aarti of both the bride and the groom is performed. Thereafter, the newly wedded couple goes to the pooja room and seeks the blessings of God.

Mooh Dikhai Ki Rasm
Mooh dikhai is the formal introduction of the new bride to the rest of the family. The mother-in-law gives the bride jewelry, cash and gifts. It is a ceremony to facilitate intimacy. The other relatives also give presents and cash to the bride.

Reception Ceremony
To make the bride feel at home, the groom’s parents usually throw a reception party. It is an occasion, where the newly wedded couple is given a warm welcome by all. It does not have an ancient origin. Infact, it is a western concept that is gaining popularity in India too.

Pag Phere
As a part of Phera Dalna ritual, the newly wedded couple visits the bride’s house on the next day after marriage. Usually, the girl’s brother comes to take them back to his home. The bride’s parents prepare a special lunch. Also, the newlyweds are given lots of gifts and sweets. This is actually a formal introduction of groom to the bride’s family.